Here you are, facing the holiday season alone. Have you been thinking about?

*how alone and lonely you feel

*excuses you can give family members as to why you can’t come this year

*what friends may be available to spend those long days with

*how another year has passed and you are (still) single

*how unfair it is that everyone else seems so happy and connected

*how you will handle the office holiday party- single, take a friend, not attend

*going to a far away (tropical?) place to escape it all

*hiding out, alone, in your own home

If these thoughts sound familiar it is probably time to reflect on your feelings regarding this holiday season. If your goal is to hide out and endure it alone, you won’t need to do too much planning. However, if you wish to experience at least a measure of the “peace and joy” associated with this time of year, you need to make and follow through with plans that allow you to participate in ways that are meaningful to YOU.

Remember, your senses are bombarded from October to December with music, images and Hallmark verses depicting the “right” experiences and expressions for the season. Remind yourself, every day if necessary, that there’s nothing wrong with being single. You have the same need and right to enjoy this season as any couple or family does. How you choose to do this is up to you.

After you have done some serious reflection, consider the following list of holiday tips designed especially for singles.

Don’t make plans out of a sense of obligation. This is also your holiday season. Set limits, make good choices and enjoy. You may ask yourself; “do I really want to go out”? If so, make your next question something like; “does it sound like something I would enjoy or be interested in?” Or, “will I have the opportunity to meet and mix with other singles?”

Avoid unrealistic expectations from others, from yourself and from the holidays themselves. Relax, enjoy and don’t expect so much that you will feel hurt or disappointed when things don’t turn out just as you had imagined. This will defeat all the positive feelings and experiences that you may have already gained.

Make sure you give thanks for all the blessings you do have in your life. Focusing on what you don’t have only encourages negative thoughts. Add a prayer of hope for the things you would like to work for in the coming year.

Don’t overbook OR overstay a good amount of time with relatives/friends. Sometimes a shorter stay works best and leaves you energy and space to get back to your own home and decompress.

Look for ways to give to or do for others. Feeling useful and appreciated will provide a great boost to your holiday spirits. Check into volunteer opportunities at local shelters and nursing homes or through any local church or non-profit group.

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One would expect that this would be the best time to purchase a home. This is considering the 30 percent drop in real estate prices throughout the U.S. in relation to prices back in 2006. Interest rates are also lower than they’ve ever been. Yet, there are still some potential stumbling blocks for those who are interested in obtaining a new home. This comes in the way of lenders setting difficult restrictions that have prevented many potential buyers from obtaining the required financing needed to purchase a new home.

“It’s obvious that since the issues that have caused so many foreclosures came about, financial regulators are keeping a close eye on lenders,” says Alberto Tarafa, respected Foreclose analyst. “After the previous disasters, lenders are wary about finding themselves in the same compromising situation.”

Not that long ago, just about anyone was considered qualified for a new home loan. Nowadays, it’s just the opposite. In addition, the loan process which used to take a very short period of time has extended considerably as documentation is being checked much closer to the actual home sales date. This is in accordance with the rulings of Federal regulators. This is causing delays of up to two weeks for settlements along with far more strict payment and credit requirements. This can make real estate purchase procedures a tenuous affair.

Interestingly enough, this is the way that it should have been during the period of the real estate boom. With lenders requiring more evidence of income and performing better credit checks, the current foreclosure rate would be quite different. But in the eyes of real estate agents, these new stumbling blocks may seem to have become too picky.

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